Tuesday, November 28, 2006

To QB, or not to QB

The Professional NFL Quarterback is what every kid wants to grow up to be. Nobody goes into their backyard as a kid and wants to be the best slot receiver in football; nope they want to be the Quarterback. Why, you ask? Well QB’s get all the chicks, that and all the accolades. But I am glad that with the accolades also is beginning to come the blame. Coaches are holding QB’s responsible when things are not going well. There are a few situations in the NFL which need to be examined at this juncture.

The first one is that of the Atlanta Falcons and Michael Vick. Now I could be known as a “Vick hater” because I am awfully critical of him, but it is only because when the Falcons actually win a game he is given every ounce of credit. Then when the Falcons lose a game it is because Head Coach Jim Mora, Jr. and Offensive Coordinator Greg Knapp are not using Vick correctly and they are trying to make him into a pocket passer. Well as I have always pointed out, pocket passers win championships and scramblers sell tickets. So if you are the Falcons you have to examine what it is you are trying to do, if selling tickets is all you care about then by all means keep running Vick’s mediocre ass out there. Although that may not work anymore since Vick decided to give the old one finger salute to the fans at the Georgia Dome yesterday after they booed him and his teammates as they jogged off the field. Good job Mike, who the hell are you now, Marcus Vick? The fans had every right to boo Vick; this was the fourth game this season where he completed less than half of his passes and the fourth game where he failed to throw a TD pass, that is atrocious. This past off-season at least three teams inquired about Falcons backup Matt Schaub, but they were told Schaub was there to stay. That says to me someone in the organization believes heavily in Schaub (former ACC player of the Year) and has little confidence that Vick is the long term answer. I say it is time to go with Schaub; the loss yesterday to the Saints puts the Falcons on the fast train to missing the playoffs, so why not play Schaub. Heck if Schaub plays well there are more than a few GM’s out there who would gladly take Vick off your hands. And after you get off the phone with those GM’s tell them I have some land in South Florida they might be interested in.

How about Rex Grossman? Is there a better team with a worse Quarterback right now than the Chicago Bears? This guy is plain awful; in the last 6 games the Bears have played he has tossed 11 interceptions. Unfortunately the Bears keep winning a lot of these games so the problem is masked. But if I am a Bears fan there is no way I go into a playoff game and have any confidence in Rex Grossman completing a pass to guy wearing the correct colored jersey. The Bears were afraid something like this may happen that is why they went out and signed veteran backup Brian Griese. Well I do not want to tell Lovie Smith how to do his job, but pal if you don’t figure this thing out quick you are going to flame out down the stretch.

Give Mike Shannahan the brass balls award. He has the sack to tell his high paid veteran QB, hey pal even though we are winning some games we need to get more production out of our quarterback. Shannahan’s team is in a good spot for a playoff position and he is going to a rookie who has never thrown a pass in the NFL. All indications in pres-season where that Cutler had the good’s to be a solid NFL QB right off the bat, and now we will find out if that is true. The Broncos have 5 games left on the season and are scratching and clawing toward the playoffs, their schedule includes: San Diego, Cincinnati and Cutler’s first start against the resurgent Seattle Seahawks.

Lastly there are the trials and tribulations of Eli Manning. I have always argued that through his ups and downs Manning’s team has been victorious even when he didn’t play exceptionally well. Now the time has come where Manning is underperforming and his team is losing, and losing badly. Though I do contend that no matter how bad the quarterback play is you cannot give up 24 points in the last 9 minutes of a game to lose. During the Giants winning streak earlier this season Manning was doing enough o get the job done, completing 58% of his passes and throwing 7 TD’ to only 4 interceptions. However, over this three game losing streak he has been downright terrible. The Giants unfortunately right now do not have another option at the QB position, but even if they did they would be reluctant to make a change because of the stature and money they have invested in him. In order for Manning to begin to show progress after this season I think it is important to get a quality veteran backup that will help teach him, but also help push him, especially if they miss the playoffs or don’t win a playoff game.

And one last note on terrible things in the NFL. How bad is the Packers defense? Seriously, this has been going on for about 6 years now and things have not improved. Last night the Seahawks threw 3 picks and a fumble thingy that was returned for a touchdown b y the Packers, yet they still surrendered 34 points 200+yards rushing and almost 400 yards total. How fucking terrible is that, everyone on that unit should be castrated.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

OJ, you suck

The attempt on Nordberg's life left me shaken and disturbed

Just when I am ready for OJ Simpson to lift me out of the pit of despair that is known as my fucking life, lift me higher than Snoop Dogg at Burning Man, higher than Cheech at Tommy Chong’s release party, really high and then he goes and cancels the “If I had Done it” TV special and book. What the hell am I supposed to get people for Christmas now? Everyone I know was getting the DVD/Book combo set. They should change the line in the song;
“Where have you gone OJ Simpson,
Our Serial killers turn their lonely eyes to you
WOO-WOO-WOO”
OJ just when I think you are once again going to become my hero, you go and disappoint me all over again.


Yeah. Assman, Jerry. I'm Cosmo Kramer, the Assman!

Speaking of Anti Heroes, how about that Michael Richards huh? Did you see this loon go off on some heckler in the audience at the laugh factory? What a genius, he just kept yelling the N word over and over again. What was that all about? This guy is such a hack, really his career went downhill after he starred as Martin Beck the “Bowtie Killer” in 1990’s “Problem Child.”


Jack Eliot: I'm a World Series MVP!
Skip: That was four years ago, Jack. Last season, you hit .235.
Jack Eliot: LAST SEASON, I led this team in ninth-inning doubles in the month of August!

(That is a quote from Mr. Baseball, it is a funny movie, check it out)

So we all know I am going to talk about the AL MVP because I am a Yankee fan and I think my guy should have been the MVP, and I am always correct. But here is the real problem I found with the voting, I really don’t mind that people voted for Morneau (Dan Filowitz, A Great Jew and Canadians worldwide can be very proud of their native son), what I do have a problem with is some dude voted Jeter 4th and somebody else voted him 3rd. To quote Dick Vitale, “Are you serious?” Even if those votes are changed Jeter still finishes second, but I want to find the yahoo who honestly believes there were 5 players more valuable than Jeter, he needs to be identified and public question by “Black” Jack McCoy.


I love LA…………….WE LOVE IT!!!!

Wow, just spend a week on the left coast and it really is the fakest place on earth, but I will tell you what; the women there are off the friggin chain. We went out to some club down in Costa Mesa when we were staying down in Irvine, folks when I tell you there wasn’t a decent looking woman in the joint I am not telling a lie. Everyone in the place was beautiful, except for me and my friends; we couldn’t have been more out of place. We were so anti Southern California it was scary, we looked like such tourists, and I loved it. I have been to LA itself and wasn’t overly impressed, but the amount of money flowing around and the phonies pretending they have mo9ney is truly a rich experience and keeps us regular folk grounded. But seriously, if you want to see beautiful women get yourself to the freakin O.C. The girls on that show don’t even come close to doing these women justice.

Speaking of Hollywood, I have seen 2 movies in the recent past, and no, one of them wasn’t the Borat thing. I guess I will see that at some point but I find Sacha Baron Cohen’s brand of humor not all that humorous. I just think he isn’t funny. And not being funny brings me to one of the movies, “Stranger than Fiction.”

The new Will Ferrell movie is definitely a sharp departure from the usual crap that I think he mostly has stunk in (Anchorman, Elf, Kicking & Screaming, Bewitched, and Talladega Nights). This movie seemed really original and a vehicle that could showcase the talents Will Ferrell has and it came nowhere close. The movie really had no point, why he was being written about and could hear the narration of the writer was never explained and there were useless characters like Dustin Hoffman (wow, I never thought I would say that). So basically I would not recommend this movie, to anyone.

The second movie I saw was “A Good Year” with Russell Crowe. Crowe’s string of excellent roles continues with this movie. Since 1997 he has made LA Confidential, Breaking Up, Mystery Alaska, The Insider, Gladiator, A Beautiful Mind, Master and Commander, and Cinderella Man, that is a Hanksian run (the only two clunkers have been Proof of Life & Heaven’s Burning). He was magnificent as the crass business man who returns to his Uncle’s chateau and vineyard with the plans to sell it off for as much money as he can, rather than maintain it which his Uncle wanted him too. The movie overall is a little slow, but it turns out to be a very moving story. I recommend to real movie fans and definitely Russell Crowe fans.

Sunday, November 12, 2006

I don't think so....

I'm going back to Cali, Cali, Cali
I'm going back to Cali.. hmm, I don't think so
I'm going back to Cali, Cali, Cali
I'm going back to Cali.. I don't think so

Going back to Cali, stylin, profilin
Growlin, and smilin, while in the sun
The top is down, on the black Corvette
And it's fly, cause it's sittin on Dayton's
Laurents steering wheel, plushed out, gold-leaf phantom top
and three girls waiting
VRRRROOM engine's blowin, the chrome, is shining
Passing all the cars on the way
Movement of the wind, back wheels spin
Pop in a cassette and push play

I'm going back to Cali, Cali, Cali
I'm going back to Cali - yea y'all, I don't think so
I'm going back to Cali, Cali, Cali
I'm going back to Cali..

I'm going back to Cali, shakin 'em, bakin 'em
Takin 'em to spots they never before hung
?? the place, on Sunset it's a trip
Where the A.C.'s cold, and the girls still strip
The record skip, but this girl kept dancin
Prancin, grindin, grinnin, romancin
I asked her to the barn, so we could hit the hay
I wanna do this, Brutus, but I don't wanna pay

I'm going back to Cali, Cali, Cali
I'm going back to Cali - no man I don't think so
I'm going back to Cali, Cali, Cali
I'm going back to Cali..
..

I'm going back to Cali, rising, surprising
Advising realizing, she's sizing me up
Her bikini - small; heels - tall
She said, she liked, the ocean
She showed me a beach, gave me a peach
and pulled out the suntan lotion
Now I thought that was fast, but this girl was faster
She's lookin for a real good time
I said, "Close your eyes, I got a surprise,"
and I ran away with the bottle of wine

I'm going back to Cali, Cali, Cali
I'm going back to Cali.. I don't think so
I'm going back to Cali, Cali, Cali
I'm going back to Cali.. I don't think so



Peeps I will be in the Golden State for the week, so enjoy whatever the hell else it is you have in life besides this ridiculous site.


Love, Peace and Hairgrease!!

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Pandemonium in Piscataway

The Bells Must Ring"

March, men of Rutgers,
Down the field today,
March to another score,
Foward to the fray,
Fight! men of Rutgers
As in days gone by,
Fight! for the Scarlet flag
Over the rest must fly.
Chorus:
Keep Rutgers colors to the fore,
For they must win so fight, fight, fight!
And we'll advance some more to score,
The Rutgers flag flies high tonight, alright, alright.
We'll fling the Scarlet banner out,
And Rutgers men will fight, fight, fight!
The bells of Queens each victr'y shout,
The bells of Queens must ring tonight.
R! U! RAH! RAH! R! U! RAH! RAH! RAH!
HOORAH! HOORAH! RUTGERS! RAH! RAH!
FIGHT! TEAM! UP! STREAM!
UP! STREAM! RED! TEAM! RAH! RAH! RUTGERS! RAH!

On the Banks of the Old Raritan

My father sent me to old Rutgers,
And resolv'd that I should be a man;
And so I settled down,
in that noisy college town,
On the banks of the old Raritan.
(Chorus)
On the banks of the old Raritan, my boys,
where old Rutgers ever more shall stand,
For has she not stood since the time of the flood,
On the banks of the old Raritan.
II.
Her ardent spirit stirred and cheered me
From the day me college years began;
Gracious Alma Mater mine;
Learning's fair and honored shrine;
On the banks of the old Raritan.
(Chorus)
III.
I love her flaming far-flung banner
I love her triumphs proud to scan,
And I glory in her fame
That's immortalized her name.
On the banks of the old Raritan.
(Chorus)
IV.
My heart clings closer than the ivy
As life runs out its fleeting span,
To the stately, ancient walls
Of her hallowed, classic halls
On the banks of the old Raritan.
(Chorus)
V.
Then sing aloud to Alma Mater,
And keep the scarlet in the van;
For with her motto high,
Rutgers' name shall never die,
On the banks of the old Raritan.
(Chorus)

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

The Association

Yes, that’s right folks everyone’s favorite league to hate is back. Nobody really likes the Association and it thugged out millionaires, but we cannot help but watch. As we usually do with the Association we will give you a brief overview of some teams and players we think are good and some that are overrated.

EASTERN CONFERENCE:

Miami- Obviously you have to like the defending champions even though they got their asses smoked last night. The team has basically the same exact roster as last year. All they have to do is keep the big fella healthy and make sure Flash doesn’t fatigue at the end of the year.

Cleveland- They have LeBron right? Okay, and as long as they do there’s always a chance. Again he still has room for improvement in his game and he was virtually unstoppable last season. Their roster is very similar to last years but with one small addition, 13 year vet David Wesley which may not seem like much but he gives them a load of experience on winning teams and is a combo guard who can relieve the minutes on Starting PG Eric Snow and not have to give the ball to LeBron.

Chicago- Yes the Bulls are for real, and they tried to prove it all on opening night. The have a great mix of players who genuinely enjoy playing with each other and the addition’s of Ben Wallace and superfreak Tyrus Thomas their defense and rebounding can only improve. Kirk Hinrich got his contract situation behind yesterday, Luol Deng is healthy, and Andre Nocioni may be the most improved player in the league.

Orlando- Dwight Howard is fast emerging as the next big man superstar in the league and PG Jameer Nelson is reminding everyone that just a few years ago he was the best college player in the country. They also have Darko Millicic who has shown signs of improvement and young forwards Trevor Ariza. The Magic could really jump up and surprise people, especially if………..eeek……….Grant Hill stays healthy.

WESTERN CONFEENCE:

San Antonio- The Western Conference is boring, all the same teams are good. The Spurs still have the best starting 5 in the league and of healthy throughout the season they are capable of winning 65 games. Tony Parker need to drop the dead weight out their in Hollywood and concentrate on the games at hand. The Spurs are the odds on favorite as they seem to be everywyear, lets hope plantar fascitius doesn’t hinder the big guy again.

Dallas- They were right there at the end with the season battling for he championship team. But owner Mark Cuban still saw improvements he could make. He inked Josh Howard to an extension and then traded Marquis Daniels and acquired Anthony Johnson and Austin Croshere 2 solid veteran bench performers. The addition of Johnson gives them a true back up PG that way Terry can rest instead of having to spell Devin Harris. Also they added veteran shooter Devean George to an already lethal offense.

Phoenix- I cannot really put this team in my overrated category because they will win 60 games, but we have seen this tired act before haven’t we? When push comes to shove you need o be able to score and defend in the half court, plain and simple and this team cannot do that. Until they can they will just be another side show on the road to the NBA title.

Houston- Ok, this is it fellas. I love T-Mac and Van Gundy, but this is the season. Everyone is healthy coming in, you have added Shane Battier a defensive presence, Bonzi Wells a third option on offense. Rookie Steve Novak could provide a spark of the bench with his shooting ability and third year forward Krik Snyder has a chance to make an impact.


Let’s be honest, the NBA title is going through San Antonio or Dallas, you are going to have to beat one if not both of those teams if you want to win it all, and that may be impossible.

OVERRATED:

These are some teams I am selling this year;

I am sick and tired of the New Jersey Nets. Same team same tired act, basically a mediocre roster of aging players and an odd team chemistry that always seems one day away from implosion because they have Vince Carter.

I think Detroit will have a big fall of this season. Flip proved last year that he is an average coach and that was with a team that was still somewhat hungry. Now Rasheed is upset at David Stern for his rules changes about talking back and Ben Wallace is not there to control this locker room.

The Clippers, I mean come on they are the Clippers. I don’t know maybe they are better than I think, maybe Chris Kaman and Shaun Livingston are better players than I give them credit for, but somehow I doubt it. Kaman just got a long term extension, usually when mediocre players like hi m shut it down, after their big pay day (see Jon Koncak).

Yes the Denver Nuggets still have the coolest thugged out team of all time, and probably the most tatted up squad ever. But this team is such a chemistry disaster and their fearless leader most of the time seems like he want to turn back to the bottle to drink his problems away, go ahead George take a sip.


Two teams I think could be a whole lot better than people think are the Utah Jazz and the Boston Celtics. There is something I like about both of their rosters, a good mix of solid vet’s and improving young players who can make impacts in this league. And they feature the 2 quietest superstars in the league in Paul Pierce and Andre Kirilenko.

PLAYERS:

Here are some young guys, old guys and rookies that could have big years or big impacts;

Bonzi Wells, Houston Rockets
Rajon Rondo, Boston Celtics
Danny Granger, Indiana Pacers (Potential All-Star)
Sean May, Charlotte Bobcats
David West, Wherever Hornets (Potential All-Star)
Ike Diogou, Golden State Warriors
Charlie Villanueva Milwaukee Bucks
Grant Hill, Orlando Magic
Brandon Roy, Portland Trailblazers
Luke Ridnour, Seattle Sonics