Very Random Thoughts
This is going to be all over the place, just a whole bunch of things over the last few days that have angered me to the point of no return.
First I will start with the stations dedicated to Music, and these of course would be MTV and VH1. Okay I have totally accepted the fact that I will not see music, ever on these stations, but then again with the crappy music out there I am not that upset. For music I tune to Direct TV channel 337, otherwise known as “The Classic.” For anyone who can get VH1 Classic I suggest doing it. Again, it reminds you why we all fell in love with Music Television in the first place.
VH1 has been running this nostalgic series called “I Love the _________.” While what they are talking about (most of the time) is very nostalgic and entertaining, the people they get to comment on it just suck. There is no other way to say it. I can not tell you how many times I have hurled a shoe at the television after Mo Rocca, Michael Ian Black, or Loni Love got done pretending to be funny. This series would work a lot better of they just did Man on the Street interviews about the songs, TV Shows, products, and other pop culture references that we grew up with. The chances of finding someone on the street that is funny is way better than listening to one of these no talent ass clowns. Plus Stuart Scott is often on these things, and that is enough to drive anyone to a methamphetamine habit.
The one thing they did talk about in the I Love 1990 was the Mike Tyson/Buster Douglas fight. And while we all remember it for Buster Douglas knocking Mike Tyson into next week, there is a little fact that so often gets overlooked. Though Tyson was not winning the fight, but in the 8th round Tyson got into Douglas and absolutely rocked his jaw with a classic Tyson uppercut. Douglas went sprawling to the canvas and as Tyson was ushered to his corner Douglas was down for a 4 count, but the referee inexplicably started the count at 1 and counted Douglas to nine before he barely made it to his feet. So most reasonable people, though knowing Tyson did get his ass waxed for every piece of that fight except that moment, know that he still should have won the fight. Of course none of the Ass Clowns commenting on this VH1 show never even saw the fight so it is basically like them commenting on what happened between Tyson and Mitch “Blood” Greene, you did not see it ands you don’t know.
While it pains me to admit it, I was flipping through the channels the other day I came across some attractive young co-ed on MTV on the show Room Raiders. Well she was looking through this one Meat Heads room and his cell phone was lying there. Of course it was a camera phone (aside from being a St. Johns basketball player I see no need for one of these). While scanning the pictures the girl found topless pictures of other women, as this happened one meat head in the car made the following comment, “Dude, that is so awesome!! You are like Gandhi dude.” I can’t even comment on that statement.
I am going to try and not sound too insensitive with this next bit of commentary, but I have had about enough of this Tsunami. Yes it is sad that people have died, but if you believe in God, which I do, I understand that God has a plan. Now while I will get attacked by my tree hugging democratic atheist friends who read this website, my faith in God will remain strong even through the struggles of the people of Indonesia and Sri Lanka. As with most things though, Americans outpouring of support has crossed the line. We are now so consumed with Tsunami relief we forget about the problems we still have as a country. And yes that includes our Presidential Administration (again I will get attacked by my Democratic Jewish friends who will blame me for voting for George Bush). We still have an army of soldiers who are underpaid and under armed and we are too worried about how much already poor people on Sri Lanka are missing. Hey these people wade through disease upon disease in these third world countries, they will persevere through this tragedy.
Movies, most of you people know how picky I can be about this subject. First of all, Million Dollar Baby still has not come to this god forsaken town that I live in. I mean Clint Eastwood, Morgan Freeman, and Hilary Swank are pretty big names. But in this shitty city we have to show Fat Albert and Racing Stripes on 15 screens a piece, thank god. Secondly, a friend of mine (and it pains me to call him a friend) and I were talking movies the other day. This crack-head owns the movie Next Friday, the sequel of the wildly hilarious Friday with Ice Cube & Chris Tucker (yes his 15 minutes of funny fame). However, he does not own Friday and it thinks the sequel is much funnier included that of Mike Epps over Chris Tucker. So while discussing this he states his belief: “If Next Friday had been released first and Friday second everyone would like Next Friday better, you know like Rocky IV. Everyone knows Rocky IV is the best but everyone says the original is better just because it came out first.” My head actually began to leak a liquid out of my left ear; I think I had a brain hemorrhage. Is this guy serious, has he ever seen Rocky or Friday? Rocky to Rocky IV, that is like comparing Kevin Garnett to Eddie Lee Wilkins. And while some people may subscribe to that theory (and a dumb theory it is) I can disprove it with 2 simple yet very different movies. Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me and the Empire Strikes Back. There you go, that theory is now rendered useless.
First I will start with the stations dedicated to Music, and these of course would be MTV and VH1. Okay I have totally accepted the fact that I will not see music, ever on these stations, but then again with the crappy music out there I am not that upset. For music I tune to Direct TV channel 337, otherwise known as “The Classic.” For anyone who can get VH1 Classic I suggest doing it. Again, it reminds you why we all fell in love with Music Television in the first place.
VH1 has been running this nostalgic series called “I Love the _________.” While what they are talking about (most of the time) is very nostalgic and entertaining, the people they get to comment on it just suck. There is no other way to say it. I can not tell you how many times I have hurled a shoe at the television after Mo Rocca, Michael Ian Black, or Loni Love got done pretending to be funny. This series would work a lot better of they just did Man on the Street interviews about the songs, TV Shows, products, and other pop culture references that we grew up with. The chances of finding someone on the street that is funny is way better than listening to one of these no talent ass clowns. Plus Stuart Scott is often on these things, and that is enough to drive anyone to a methamphetamine habit.
The one thing they did talk about in the I Love 1990 was the Mike Tyson/Buster Douglas fight. And while we all remember it for Buster Douglas knocking Mike Tyson into next week, there is a little fact that so often gets overlooked. Though Tyson was not winning the fight, but in the 8th round Tyson got into Douglas and absolutely rocked his jaw with a classic Tyson uppercut. Douglas went sprawling to the canvas and as Tyson was ushered to his corner Douglas was down for a 4 count, but the referee inexplicably started the count at 1 and counted Douglas to nine before he barely made it to his feet. So most reasonable people, though knowing Tyson did get his ass waxed for every piece of that fight except that moment, know that he still should have won the fight. Of course none of the Ass Clowns commenting on this VH1 show never even saw the fight so it is basically like them commenting on what happened between Tyson and Mitch “Blood” Greene, you did not see it ands you don’t know.
While it pains me to admit it, I was flipping through the channels the other day I came across some attractive young co-ed on MTV on the show Room Raiders. Well she was looking through this one Meat Heads room and his cell phone was lying there. Of course it was a camera phone (aside from being a St. Johns basketball player I see no need for one of these). While scanning the pictures the girl found topless pictures of other women, as this happened one meat head in the car made the following comment, “Dude, that is so awesome!! You are like Gandhi dude.” I can’t even comment on that statement.
I am going to try and not sound too insensitive with this next bit of commentary, but I have had about enough of this Tsunami. Yes it is sad that people have died, but if you believe in God, which I do, I understand that God has a plan. Now while I will get attacked by my tree hugging democratic atheist friends who read this website, my faith in God will remain strong even through the struggles of the people of Indonesia and Sri Lanka. As with most things though, Americans outpouring of support has crossed the line. We are now so consumed with Tsunami relief we forget about the problems we still have as a country. And yes that includes our Presidential Administration (again I will get attacked by my Democratic Jewish friends who will blame me for voting for George Bush). We still have an army of soldiers who are underpaid and under armed and we are too worried about how much already poor people on Sri Lanka are missing. Hey these people wade through disease upon disease in these third world countries, they will persevere through this tragedy.
Movies, most of you people know how picky I can be about this subject. First of all, Million Dollar Baby still has not come to this god forsaken town that I live in. I mean Clint Eastwood, Morgan Freeman, and Hilary Swank are pretty big names. But in this shitty city we have to show Fat Albert and Racing Stripes on 15 screens a piece, thank god. Secondly, a friend of mine (and it pains me to call him a friend) and I were talking movies the other day. This crack-head owns the movie Next Friday, the sequel of the wildly hilarious Friday with Ice Cube & Chris Tucker (yes his 15 minutes of funny fame). However, he does not own Friday and it thinks the sequel is much funnier included that of Mike Epps over Chris Tucker. So while discussing this he states his belief: “If Next Friday had been released first and Friday second everyone would like Next Friday better, you know like Rocky IV. Everyone knows Rocky IV is the best but everyone says the original is better just because it came out first.” My head actually began to leak a liquid out of my left ear; I think I had a brain hemorrhage. Is this guy serious, has he ever seen Rocky or Friday? Rocky to Rocky IV, that is like comparing Kevin Garnett to Eddie Lee Wilkins. And while some people may subscribe to that theory (and a dumb theory it is) I can disprove it with 2 simple yet very different movies. Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me and the Empire Strikes Back. There you go, that theory is now rendered useless.
1 Comments:
This ought to be fun.
First off, aren't you too old to be watching MTV? I thought, like the VJ's, there's a chip in us all that means large muscle bound men drag away those of us that are over the age of 12 that still watch that network. I hate to tell this to someone who's not Chris Michaels, but grow up. You're fat and old, if you ever set foot on the MTV site, you would be shot, bagged, stuffed and mounted on the wall of the 14-year old that sent back the most Yu-gi-O proof of purchases. Leave this network for the elementary school aged children it caters to. Stop commenting about what you see there. It can and does nothing but anger you. If you argue that they occassionaly show a pretty face or reruns of whatever show Ashley or Nicole or Alvin or Simon Simpson is on, remember you have porn on your computer 24-7 and change the channel. Whatever happened to the fat bastard that left it on ESPN all the time? Let's bring that bastard back...
Mike Tyson is a modern day Greek tragedy and if Willie Shakes was alive today, he would buy the rights and make a movie with Kenneth Brannagh playing Cus D'Amato. It would kill at Cannes and just crest $100 million before hitting DVD shevles with bonus footage of Tyson's early career and the great KO's. Boxing fans like myself would drool for days...
As far as dead people in the Far East, if Americans really cared about anybody but themselves, they would have PSA's and set up relief funds and eliminate all the homeless children and families IN THIS COUNTRY!!! Has anyone walked around Atlanta? How about Portland, Oregon or Boston? I'm not even mentioning the thousands (AND THOUSANDS) of the Rock's fans that watch Smackdown on the one TV in the beat up shack they call a home in JUST ABOUT EVERY STATE, USA.
If rich people, meaning white people, in this country really gave a damn about anybody besides themselves, about anything besides finding a tax write-off so Johnny Government gives them more back, if they cared, they would set up funds for the underprivledged in the fuckin' 48 states, but I'll get off my soapbox for a second...
And I'll close with the shame that Chris Tucker's 15 seconds are over, but they lasted longer than just Friday - although that's probably his peak. Tucker had a long standup career that gained stature on Def Jam on HBO, the same place where Eddie Griffin and Bernie Mac made their mark. Chris was a funny motha fucka, but there really wasn't much for him in the cinema. I always thought he would work better on stage. I mean, can't you see him as a great Peter Pan?
Sandy Duncan OUT.
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