Saturday, January 15, 2005

Fuck Bitches, Get Money

Matt Leinart has decided to forgo this years NFL draft for the joy of playing collegiate football for a 5th and final season. What in the hell is this guy thinking? What a moron, I hope he gets decapitated in the first game of the season. Don’t give me any of this crap about how it is the “right” thing to do or how “classy” he is for choosing to come back to school. He is a moron. He is guaranteed to be a top five pick, most likely #1 overall.

What is the allure of going back? The chance to win 3 national championships, I guess. Maybe I just don’t give a crap enough about national titles. Hell nobody really remembers Tommie Frazier and he won two and came damn near close to winning three in a row. I remember guys who go to the Hall of Fame and win Super Bowls, you know like Trent Dilfer (ok, so that is a bad example). The ultimate prize in college football is the Heisman Trophy. Oh wait, Leinart has already one that, and chances of winning two, are slim and none especially with Adrian Peterson still playing college football.

And puh-lease do not tell how there are things he can work on with is game in college football to better prepare him for the NFL. Bullshit, you don’t play teams like Stanford, Arizona, and Oregon State in the NFL. You play men, who move with lighting speed, and hit with extreme power. In order to become a better player in the league you need to get up there and learn the game. All he has done is taken open year off of his pro career. Tim Duncan would have still been the #1 pick in the NBA draft his junior year and still would have won rookie of the year in 1997 instead of 1998

Hummmm, what else do we all crave in this world? Oh yeah, stacks and stacks of cash. That is why we wish we were famous pro athletes or actors or rock musicians. We want money. Last time I checked Matt Leinart does not get paid to play at USC, even the under the table booster money is not that much. And stop giving me that excuse about some damned insurance policy he took out in case he gets hurt. Insurance policies don’t give you $10 million singing bonuses. He is totally missing his opportunity to get paid.

Oh yeah, lastly we would all like the chance to choose between which playmates we feel like dating today. Well I am sure Mr. Leinart gets his fair share of tale in southern California but has he ever seen League tail? Son, there is a reason those ladies are chasing guys in the league and not college players. Just as the talent gets deeper on the field it certainly gets deeper off the field as well. Matt think of all those lovely young ladies who have to keep going home with the current crop of 49er QB’s like Ken Dorsey, Tim Rattay and Cody Pickett. Think of all the women you would have Matt, oh won’t some please think of the lonely women!!!

Plain and simple you need to go now, it is now known as the Terrence Morris Syndrome. Mr. Morris missed out on millions and millions of dollars by pursuing his dreams of a national championship and wanting to stay in college with his friends. Now where the hell is he? It is a no brainer decision and some how Leinart screwed it up. Which make me believe he should not be allowed to carry sharp objects and also be required to ride in a shorter team bus than everyone else. College is supposed to prepare you for you life and career, well Matt’s life should involved the following activities; “Fuck Bitches, and Get Money,” but sadly it won’t. RIP Notorious B.I.G.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm sorry, my fat friend. While you're usually on point, this time you're thinking in the right ball park, but we're talking baseball, not the hot dogs you stuff in your mouth.
Yes, League tail is better than college tail UNLESS you reside in Southern California and the greatest ass under the age of 21 stomps hand over foot to get to your campus. How many 17-year olds from Iowa with perfect tits move around with NFL teams, trying to get a break into Hollywood?
Oh yeah, that's right. NONE.
How many 18-year old bombshells hot enough to make you wanna slap your momma move to LA and bang enough USC and UCLA undergrads that they figure porn isn't that bad of an idea? Thousands every month and thank god for them.
Sure, he's taking a calculated risk by not coming out now. Sure, his draft stock can only go down and sure, he probably won't get either prize for the 'reasons' he decided to come back, although you must admit USC has a legit shot to win the third title. Sure, you're right - it doesn't matter, but if you're chilling in a sweet off-campus apartment by the beach (sponsered by boosters), working a 10-hour job over the summer (paid a full 40-hours by boosters) and banging everything that saunters across your pad of land just because they all know your name and face, how can you turn that down for something you might fail at, especially when you can delay it for a year.
So what you're telling me is next year, Leinart isn't going to be a first round pick? OK, maybe he won't go No. 1 and get pounded into dirt behind a horrible 49ers line, cashing a $11 million dollar bonus. But at worst, he goes at No. 20, gets a $2 million bonus and rides pine behind Chad Pennington. Either way, he gets paid more money than you and all your friends.
Shit, maybe it decided to stay just to piss morons like you off. How many of us, if given the opportunity to stay in college for one more year with a guarentee that after said year, we would be able to walk directly into our field of choice, wouldn't take one more year of drinking the night away, waking and baking and dealing with pussy that would actually talk to you, not just give you the cold shoulder or a wrong number. I mean, what's the deal with that anyway? If you didn't like me, why didn't you just say so when I walked over to you. No, you wait until I buy a drink, a fucking $7 martini and wasted 20 minutes of my life telling me about some dumb ass opinion on the Bush administration you probably got from CNN. The only reason I wanted to even approach you was the tits that nearly popped out of....
Uh...
Yeah, don't bash Leinart.
Nelson Mutz OUT

9:37 AM  

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