The Hurricane is Coming, the Hurricane is coming
What a bunch of fucking ridiculous nonsense this damned hurricane is. This country has become soft. I remember when we used to take on hurricanes like they were the girl from down the street. Earthquake, huh, we spit on you weak little earthquake. What the fuck happened to the Delta (America) I used to know? Where's the spirit? Where's the guts, huh? "Ooh, we're afraid to go with you Bluto (Kris), we might get in trouble." Well just kiss my ass from now on! Not me! I'm not gonna take this. Wormer (Hurricane Hugo), he's a dead man! Marmalard (Hurricane Charlie) dead! Niedermeyer (Hurricane Frances)...
Sorry about that I got a little carried away.
People have begun to ask me stupid questions like; "What are you going to do about the hurricane?" or, "Are you ready for Frances?" What is one supposed to do? I suspect I will spend it as most fall saturdays, enjoying some college football on TV, and maybe catch an occasional classic like Jaws or Back to the Future on TBS. Do I really need to go to the store and buy eggs and canned food goods? Heck I don't eat eggs or drink milk or eat anything besides Tuna that comes out of a can. I live 150 miles inland, so at the most we will get a ton of rain and probably some tropical storm forces winds, you know 55-75 mph. So at the most I will be without power for a day, maybe two. Would this truly require world class panic on my part? I think not. How else should I prepare for Ms. Frances? Maybe I can go do some windsprints, a few jumping jacks and som push ups, that way I am physically sound to run outside and push the hurricane away. Not even some push ups would make me strong enough to stop this hurricane.
Put it this way, as long as I have cable I will be 100% fine. If the cable goes out and I still have electricity than I can operate at 90% efficiency, I own 85 movies and a Play Station 2. Otherwise I need not worry or change my dailly life and routine. For if I do change the way I go about my daily business the terrorists will certainly emerge victorious once again.
Sorry about that I got a little carried away.
People have begun to ask me stupid questions like; "What are you going to do about the hurricane?" or, "Are you ready for Frances?" What is one supposed to do? I suspect I will spend it as most fall saturdays, enjoying some college football on TV, and maybe catch an occasional classic like Jaws or Back to the Future on TBS. Do I really need to go to the store and buy eggs and canned food goods? Heck I don't eat eggs or drink milk or eat anything besides Tuna that comes out of a can. I live 150 miles inland, so at the most we will get a ton of rain and probably some tropical storm forces winds, you know 55-75 mph. So at the most I will be without power for a day, maybe two. Would this truly require world class panic on my part? I think not. How else should I prepare for Ms. Frances? Maybe I can go do some windsprints, a few jumping jacks and som push ups, that way I am physically sound to run outside and push the hurricane away. Not even some push ups would make me strong enough to stop this hurricane.
Put it this way, as long as I have cable I will be 100% fine. If the cable goes out and I still have electricity than I can operate at 90% efficiency, I own 85 movies and a Play Station 2. Otherwise I need not worry or change my dailly life and routine. For if I do change the way I go about my daily business the terrorists will certainly emerge victorious once again.
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