Who's Hotter?
Again, I need to apologize to my loyal reader. Things here have been hectic and I have been working a lot, so it has been hard to post on here. I do appreciate all the concern of my readers (“Hey, why don’t you write some crap on your website you lazy bastard.” Truly caring!!). As some of you may have been aware, I posed a question on who is hotter, Natalie Portman or Katie Holmes. Many responded to my email query and the debate was fierce, so I have decided again to debut a new segment which shant last very long. The Who is Hotter debate? Remember that the opinions expressed on this website are solely mine, and I don’t give a fuck who likes it or not.
Katie Holmes- The Dawson’s Creek girl next door. Miss Holmes has a very young teenage beauty quality about her. She has this very sly looking smile that would make a man melt in his shoes. I love her long straight hair and her deep eyes which are great qualities on a brunette. She also has a very good body, however her legs are a little thicker than some realize and her chest is actually not as big as one would think. (There is a home movie of her flashing a friend’s video camera, while drunk it appears). Overall Katie Holmes is definitely someone you would not mind bringing home and saying she is your girl; no matter how much of a freak she may be she can always pull off the innocent good girl image. 8.4 Out of 10
Natalie Portman- Shot to super stardom as Queen Amadela in Star Wars. She has a certain glow that surrounds her. She has a stunning set of eyes which can pierce through you like a laser. She has a face that is absolutely perfect. Her features are flawless; eyes, nose, mouth, jaw-line, everything is perfectly sculpted. Granted when one looks at her body there is a glaring omission on her chest. And I am a breast man, (and so is everybody, it sounds cool to say “I am not that into breasts, I like a girl with a nice butt.” It is the whole Spice Girls album thing again, you think you are cooler and more hip if you deny that you have a Spice Girl’s CD, just like saying you are not into breasts.) But with Ms. Portman I can move past that. She has an n incredibly tight petite body. She is very toned (naturally) and she does have a great booty. She is like Lex Luger, The Total Package. In fact she gets my total package going!!! 9.0 Out of 10
There you have it folks, who is hotter this week, Natalie Portman wins by a piece of Motzah. I will be interested to see the debate that this thing sparks. Also, I am looking for strong audience participation in this segment; I will need you the fan to come up with ideas for whom I should compare next week.
Katie Holmes- The Dawson’s Creek girl next door. Miss Holmes has a very young teenage beauty quality about her. She has this very sly looking smile that would make a man melt in his shoes. I love her long straight hair and her deep eyes which are great qualities on a brunette. She also has a very good body, however her legs are a little thicker than some realize and her chest is actually not as big as one would think. (There is a home movie of her flashing a friend’s video camera, while drunk it appears). Overall Katie Holmes is definitely someone you would not mind bringing home and saying she is your girl; no matter how much of a freak she may be she can always pull off the innocent good girl image. 8.4 Out of 10
Natalie Portman- Shot to super stardom as Queen Amadela in Star Wars. She has a certain glow that surrounds her. She has a stunning set of eyes which can pierce through you like a laser. She has a face that is absolutely perfect. Her features are flawless; eyes, nose, mouth, jaw-line, everything is perfectly sculpted. Granted when one looks at her body there is a glaring omission on her chest. And I am a breast man, (and so is everybody, it sounds cool to say “I am not that into breasts, I like a girl with a nice butt.” It is the whole Spice Girls album thing again, you think you are cooler and more hip if you deny that you have a Spice Girl’s CD, just like saying you are not into breasts.) But with Ms. Portman I can move past that. She has an n incredibly tight petite body. She is very toned (naturally) and she does have a great booty. She is like Lex Luger, The Total Package. In fact she gets my total package going!!! 9.0 Out of 10
There you have it folks, who is hotter this week, Natalie Portman wins by a piece of Motzah. I will be interested to see the debate that this thing sparks. Also, I am looking for strong audience participation in this segment; I will need you the fan to come up with ideas for whom I should compare next week.
1 Comments:
I still thought she was hot in the Professional, but you're dead on with Natalie. Once somebody knocks her up, she'll get a little more lumpy up top.
How about Eva Mendez (Stuck on You, Out of Time, All about the Benjamins) vs. Penelope Cruz (Vanilla Sky, Gothika, Woman on Top) vs. Gabrielle Union (Bad Boys II, Deliver un from Eva, Something the Lord Made) vs. Roselyn Sanchez (Chasing Papi, Boat Trip, Rush Hour 2)?
And whatever happened to Jennifer Love? Does she not get any anymore? I caught Heartbreakers on TBS last night and she's got a tight little ass in all those one-piece short skirts that push up those cans to the surface. Granted, she's not on the level of the chicks to the top, but that's not any reason to kick her out of bed...
Wilmer Valderrama (Fez, who briefly dated her according to IMDB.com) OUT
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